Is it incest if i didn't know?

Is it incest if I didn’t know?

               Hello. I am Samantha. Sam for short. I am thirty-eight years old but I look much younger. I have lived a sheltered life and not really versed in the sexual practices of modern-day singles. In fact, I have only had sex one time in my life. It was a disaster. I had just turned eighteen, I was seduced by a twenty-nine-year-old man. No, it wasn’t rape. I never told him no, stop, back off or anything to discourage him. I allowed it to happen.

               I remember the pain of losing my cherry, I remember how disgusting I felt with myself, how dirty, cheap. Like I had betrayed myself and all my moral beliefs.

               Then the worst of it. I missed my period, and the next and the next. My mother sent me to live with my aunt in Garry Indiana for the rest of the year where I had my son and gave him up for adoption.

               That was a lot harder than anyone, including me would ever think it would be. He was a part of me. There was no way I could support him though. I had to go back to high school the next year to complete the credits so that I could graduate. I was happy they let me do it.

               I managed to get into a junior collage and graduate with honors. From there I got into law school then I went to work in a law firm. I started making them money before I was able to take the Barr.

               Ok, I passed it on my third try. But I passed it. I started making good money for someone my age and found a house I loved. It was small but I loved it. I moved in by myself and lived an abnormal life as you may see it, but to me it was comfortable.

               As I said before, I had only had sex one time still at this point. I started to get on chat lines and that was my social life. Nothing to right home about for sure. I had not really talked to my mom after she made me give my son up for adoption. I wanted to keep and raise him. but I also know the truth that I really couldn’t. But I still believe that if mom and dad would have helped me, I could have.

               September 22 will be forever burned into my mind as the day I lost half of me. It has been almost nineteen years and I still cry my eyes out every September. I was hoping it would get better, but it doesn’t.

               It was July actually when I was chatting away with random strangers, one of the men I chatted with had started to win my heart. He was so sweet and handsome.

               I am sure he sent his true photos because we had several web chats with each other too. He was built like a brick house full of muscles and tone. WOW….      

               He was a lot younger than me. but he said he loves older women. I told him “You are just trying to get me to cyber with you, and show you some skin.” Teasing him a bit. But still keeping it alive.

               “Cyber, no. a little skin I would like. But really I just want you to know I find you very pretty and I want to keep it going as long as I can.”

               Damn. What do they teach these kids in school these days?

               After that I started openly flirting with him both on line and I gave him my cell number and started flirting with him on the phone too.

               It was September when I started backing off. I didn’t really know I did. But I did. he kept calling me. I ignored the calls and I quit chatting too.

Finally, I returned his call and had to tell him I was sorry for what I was doing. That it wasn’t his fault and I explained that September was a hard time for me. He of course asked why. I really didn’t want to tell him, but I liked him, so I told him about my son, and how I was forced to give him up for adoption and that September 22nd was the hardest day of the year for me. I can remember his response as if he spoke it to me yesterday.

“SO, if we get together, I won’t be able to have any more birthdays? Or will I have to just pick another day to celebrate my arrival to the world?”

“You where born in September???” I almost shouted.

“The 22nd,” he answered. “Wow. That is something.” I took it as a coincidence and never questioned it. talking to someone who was born on the same day I had to give my son up helped me come to terms with my decision I had made some twenty years earlier. It also brought me closer to him. and I liked that.

We started to have cybersex and I even did some risqué cam shows for him. I was starting to really enjoy his company when he told me he had a two-week vacation at Christmas. He told me that he wanted to spend it with me. he had already gotten reservations for a flight near me and wanted to know if I wanted to pick him up.

This was a huge step for me. He already knew I had only had sex one time in my life. He assured me that the day he landed I would be rid of that statement. He told me he would seduce me to a groveling mass of ‘please take me now’ in a matter of hours from the time he landed.

I remember laughing harder with this young man than I have ever laughed in my life. I told him to get the tickets, but I bet him dinner that he wasn’t getting anything off me till maybe day three. Somehow, I knew I would never win that bet. But I wanted to challenge him.

It was December 20th when his plane landed. I was hoping that he didn’t get on, and I was praying he did. I was a bundle of nerves as I watched people walking out of the airways. I was behind the barricade that security set up for all the terrorists to stand behind. When I recognized him. WOW…. He took my breath away. He looked taller than he said. He looked a lot more handsome than his photos showed. He was dressed in a polo shirt that hugged his frame so nice. Just looking at him I felt my nipples get hard.

He had a pair of kakis on with loafers and a matching belt. I watched his eyes meet mine and his smile lit up the whole airport. Damn he was handsome and hot. To win the bet I had to go three days with out him touching me. well guess what. I don’t think I could make it out of the airport before I would give myself to him. If by chance he doesn’t take or make the first move, I will. Dam I want him. and that is something because I have never in my life wanted a man. But by god I wanted this one….

He came straight to me not losing his smile. “Hi…” I say nervously. He shakes his head and kisses me. damn and what a kiss. He took the back of my head and gave me an open mouth kiss that melted my knees. I felt myself falling but he caught me at the last moment. Damn was I going to have some fun. I thought as I felt my pussy getting wetter than she has ever been.

Finally, he breaks the kiss and said. “We need a room. So, what do you say to let’s get out of here?”

“Do you have any Balls… I mean Buggs… I mean Bags…” I say as I feel my cheeks turning the color of rubies.

               His smile cut threw my misgivings and my humiliation. “Yes, I have a couple. And one of them includes a gift for you…” he takes my hand and begins to lead me to the baggage claim.

               To be honest I didn’t care where he was leading me. I was hoping to a stall in the men’s room so I could lose that bet we made. But alas we found the baggage claim instead.

               He had two big bags, I tried to carry one for him but he pushed me away and told me he had it. I was glad, they looked heavy.

               As I led him to my car, I asked him “Do you always look this good?” it just came out.

               He chuckled a bit, “No I just got made up for my girl.” He swung the suitcase around me and pulled me to him. His embrace felt really good. Then he kissed my cheek, which felt even better.

We got to the car, he put his bags in the back and then he went to the driver’s door. I looked at him supposing he wanted to drive, but he opened the door as I had already unlocked it and waited for me to get in. It had been a very long time since a man had opened a door for me. I smiled and thanked him as I slid into my car.

We chatted wile I drove home, I asked him if he was hungry. I didn’t see his look when he said. “I am starving!!!” I turned to tell him we can stop and get something to eat when I noticed that he wasn’t hungry for food. His look made my cheeks blush, my pussy gush, and my nipples harden like diamonds. I shuddered for a moment trying to get my composure. I thought of telling him I wasn’t on the menu but I didn’t want to tell him that because I wanted to be his menu more than I even Knew.

We finally made it to my house. He took my arm as I parked in the driveway, he told me to “Stay here.” I looked at him not knowing. He got out and almost ran around the car to open my door for me. I was absolutely speechless.

We walked up to the house and he dropped the bags as I started to unlock the door. before I could go into the house, I don’t know how he did it but I found myself being lifted by his strong arms under my knees and shoulders firmly holding me to his strong masculine chest.

“Woooa!” I gasped as I was unexpectedly lifted and for the fist time carried into my home. ‘I loved it.’ as he slowly let me down, I wished he would go on and carry me on in my bedroom. But he instead just stood me up and held me firmly making sure I was steady before he rapped his arms around me and began to kiss me passionately. I felt wetness dripping down my legs now. I had never wanted like I did right then.

As he continued to kiss me, I felt his hands slowly caressing my body. Softly and warmly he started to cup my breasts. I felt electricity bolt all threw my body as he continued to explore me.

Finally, he broke the kiss to look at me. The same look that made me gush before, and it did it again. “I lose…” I say emphatically. “You win….” I brokenly continue. “I am yours.” I have no idea where that came from.

He smiles and holds back a small laugh. He kisses me again. My pussy just went into begging mode. Like I ever thought it could do that. I grab his arm and start to pull him to my room. Fuck the baggage still outside the open door. fuck the neighbors, fuck the mail man, trash man or anyone else that wanted to peak in… I wanted him and I wanted him now. Damn the consequences.  

I was waring a pretty skirt and blouse combination. I had stocking and short heals on. Only my bra and panties made it to my room. But his shirt and pants didn’t make it either only his boxers. He picked me up and carried me over the threshold of the bedroom door as well. He took me to my bed laid me down and I for the second time of my life surrendered to a man. I told myself that he could do what ever he wanted. Bend me, take me, mold me to what ever he wanted to do. I would do it.

My braw and panties quickly disappeared and I found both his hands and his mouth replaced them as he started suckling my nipples. ‘Oh, God’ are they sensitive. It was like they were wired straight to my pussy. I had no idea.

I hadn’t noticed that my legs where spread, until I felt his hand touching my pussy, his fingers touching me down there and I had my first orgasm that very second. It was the first time a man has ever made me come. I screamed my orgasm threw the house as it was also the most powerful I had ever felt. He backed off then and climbed up beside me and started to just kiss me.

I felt myself calm form the orgasm but not completely.

“Samantha?” “Yes!” ”I, will buy dinner for us tonight. You will be way too tired to cook.” I giggled and say. “Why would you say that?”

He pulled his boxers down. His cock was as hard as I had ever seen one, and I have only seen them on the internet. I really didn’t see the only one that has been in me when I had gotten it the first time. It wasn’t as big as I had expected, but I knew the camera made men’s cocks look bigger than they really were. But boy was it hard.

He maneuvered between my legs and grabbed a pillow. Then he lifted my hips up and put the pillow under my ass. He than began to mount me. I felt anticipation, fear and a lot of other things as he placed the head of his cock to my dripping wet pussy. He moved forward and I felt it fill me. As I felt each inch of him inter me, the feelings of fulfillment went through the roof. Then something happened that I didn’t expect. I felt for the first time like a woman. A hole woman. I knew he wanted me emotionally and spiritually. And now he wanted me physically. I had never had this so I never knew how much I wanted it, needed it. the emotions of what was happening started to overwhelm me as he started to slowly thrust into me. But then he suddenly stopped.

The look of compassion on his face was overwhelming and I broke down. He rolled to his back and brought me to his strong chest and held me. ever so softly caressing my body. Not in a sexual way. But in a caring and compassionate way. I cried on his chest for a good long while before I heard him say. “I know it has to be a lot for you. the second man you have ever been with. And I care for you. I don’t think he did. if you want to wait I can, as long as you want.

His words didn’t help my emotions coming to the surface. However, I managed to get out. “I don’t want to wait. I want you. I want you more than I can say. I just need a moment.”

He stroked my hair softly and kissed my forehead. I felt him calmly just wait for me to continue. So, I reached down to take ahold of the cock that was still as hard as steel. I blushed at myself as I took it in my hand. stroking it, wanting it. wandering how it was going to feel like when it erupted in me. how much come he had for me.

“Take me. don’t stop, just take me and don’t stop for anything.” I say in a calm authoritative voice.

“Are you sure???” he questions.

“I am positive!”

He roles me all the way over till I am on my left side. He adjusts himself until he is somewhat spooning me. I feel his hard cock start to inter me from behind. He moves my legs till I am laying in a V position. Then he rams it in me. “MMMffff…” I get out as I feel myself filled. Not having sex for so long I felt pain as my pussy yielded to him. but the pleasure was so much more and made up for the pain. He started immediately to fuck in and out of me. thrusting powerfully into my ass cheeks with his hips, with each stroke. I had only the briefest instant of deja vu as he kept fucking into my pussy and my body. Each thrust bringing me closer to something that I didn’t even expect. Another powerful orgasm.

I came again. then a third time. before he dismounted me and forced me onto my hands and knees. He again mounted me roughly and started to take me again. I could feel his cock pushing against my cervix with each of his thrust and asked myself if he was longer, I would not be able to take him. I met each of his thrusts now and could feel him take me to a new level of pleasure when he started to call out “CUMMING.” His words and grunts alone took me over the edge and I called out my fourth but not final orgasm. I could feel his hot juices erupt in me, filling me with his seed and it was only then that I thought… maybe this would be a good time to start taking the pill. As I had not even thought of birth control. SHIT, SHIT, SHIT….

He took me to the shower, then back to bed. Then to the kitchen, we made sandwiches. Then back to bed.

Only when I felt a very soft cock slip from my very, very sloppy cum filled pussy did we fall asleep.    

I woke before him, I slowly got out of bed looking at him. Proud of him for some reason, and proud of myself that I was able to satisfy him the day and night before. I didn’t know if I could keep him or not. But I did know that I wanted to. He was half my age. He was twenty and I was thirty-eight. The same age as my son, I thought for only a second. Then I though that and he was born on the same day as my son.

I silently hoped I wasn’t trying to replace my son with him. well not this way anyway. I decided that I would make breakfast for him. he is going to need his energy for tonight… well if I have my way he will anyway. I was not as steady on my feet as I thought I should be. I know after all those orgasms I maybe shouldn’t be but it has been almost six hours since my last. Then I realized I really didn’t mind the thrilling unsteadiness I was feeling. It was a thrilling reminder of the fabulous party we had last night between my legs. I went and took a shower and then got dressed and into the kitchen. I fixed some home fried potatoes, home made biscuits sausage and eggs.

I was about to go to my room to get him when he walked into the kitchen wearing only his boxers. Not that I was going to complain.

He walked right by my nice breakfast and kissed me but good. Then he eased back and asked into my mouth, “Any regrets?” I shook my head no and he said into my mouth again. “Thank God….” Then he raised me up by my hips and sat me on the counter. He opened my legs and put himself between them.

I had thrown on a old house dress, no bra but I did put panties on. he continued to kiss me and then his hands where working between my legs.

I was just about to stop this. I mean really, I was on my kitchen counter. It was where I made food, where I ate. I did the dishes here. And my pantie clad ass was on the counter. But just as he had broken the kiss he was giving me and I was able to say something. I felt my panties pulled to the side and his cock interring me yet again. and with a “HUMMMFFF” my resolve to stop him evaporated.

Now this was Sunday morning. We made love, ate breakfast, made love, took a shower. Made love in the shower. Boy was he strong, he lifted me and put me on his cock in the shower. Funny I never even thought of slipping. I had never felt safer than with him.

From the shower we started to get dressed. Didn’t make it and made love again in bed. Got up and made it out of the house where I thought I would be safe from his seductive charms. But I took him to a park not far form my house and found a parking spot and made love in the car…  we walked around the park a while.

He started sharing things with me. We had talked intimately several times on line but it was nothing like being face to face. We found a baseball diamond with some bleachers and sat together. I was afraid he might fuck me here too. and what was scary was I would have let him.

“Sam, I really like you. and want to know more about you.” I wanted to know more about him too. so, I simply said “You first. Tell me something special I don’t know about you.”

“HUMMM.” He thought for a moment. “I am adopted…” he said.

“You are? Wow. I would have never guessed; you are so together.”

“My mom and dad did a wonderful job raising me. I had every advantage and they didn’t let me get away with anything… and I mean anything. They never abused me ever, but they kept me in line and I graduated high school valedictorian. And I have a full scholarship in collage and I owe them everything.”

“What happened to you birth mom?” I asked.

“don’t know but it is your turn…. Tell me something now.”

I smiled and nodded my head. It was my turn and I owed him a truth. I thought for a moment and finally said something I never expected myself to say. “I had a son when I was very young. And gave him up for adoption.” “You told me about that. My last birthday… but can I ask you something?” “Shure.” I say. “Why did you give him up?”

I swallowed. I felt the blood leaving my face. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to answer that, it was that I never admitted it. I felt my eyes starting to sting as I opened my mouth “It was the hardest thing I had ever done.” I felt the tears start dripping on my cheeks. “I was young, no job, in school and had no way of supporting myself. let alone my son.” I had a hard time looking at him while I was speaking. “I am ashamed of myself.”

“What about your mom and dad?” he asked me.

“They refused to help me. They denied my son, there grandson.” I just breathed for a long time then “I haven’t really spoken to them since. I don’t think I ever will again.”

“I am so sorry Samantha. I wish I could do something to help. That had to have hurt.” He put his arms around me and held me good. And for the first time ever I cried over the loss of my son in someone’s arms.

It was a good long time before I calmed down enough and herd him ask. “I hope my mom felt like you when she gave me up.” “I am sure she did. I can tell your form experience that I have never ever felt worse than the day I said goodbye to my son. It was the hardest thing I have ever done. And I swear I would never do it again.” He continued to hold me, and he fit with me like a glove. I felt his compassion and his love. He had a lot of both to give.

“So, ask me something you want to know.” I told him. “Ok, where did you live when you were pregnant. I told him Junction City.

Then he said. “WWWOOOO. I was getting worried for a moment. Because I was borne in Garry Indiana. and I had a horrible thought with the birthdays and all that you might be my mom…”

“GARRY…. Indiana….” I say, feeling a little faint.

               “Yea.” He answers. That’s where I was borne. At Charity hospital in Garry.” He said it almost cheerfully. Then I heard him yell “SAM!!!!!”

               I came too in his arms. He caught me before I fell completely off the bleachers. The first word he said to me was “MOM???” The first word I was able to get out of my mouth was “SON???”  

               We talked for a long time. I couldn’t believe that the chances of me being his mother was so slim that I couldn’t prosses it. we went home and found a place to take a D.N.A. Test. We had that done the next day. 

We sat on the sofa that evening looking at each other. Damn, he was so handsome. I looked at him as my friend, my lover and my son. He was all three and I didn’t want to give any of it up. “Samuel?” I ask. “I love you. I don’t know if you are my son. But I have fallen for you. hard and I love you. I don’t want to stop where our relationship had led us. I am in love with you and I want you. I need you to want me too.”

“But I do, Samantha. I have always wanted you. I want you now even though you might be my mom. I think I fell in love with you too.”

“think?”

“Well, Yea, Well, shit. Yes, I am in love with you too. and what is funny is I want you to be my mom. I want to find out that you are my mom. And I don’t want to stop loving you either. I want you Samantha, and I want to make love to you too.”

“Then take me…. take me to our room and take what is yours. and don’t stop. Whether I start crying or not. Keep loving me. keep loving me no matter what…”

He came to me and picked me up off the sofa. He carried me to our room and brought me to our bed. And he made love to me. It wasn’t the fucking he had given me the days before. He made love softly, gently, caringly. He took his time memorizing my body, enjoying every inch of it. I was happy to let him too.

We carried on like lovers. He changed collages started back to school, I was in a position to pay for the education but I dint have to. My firm found out about him and offered to sponsor him in collage. We did it for several students as a tax wright off and for public relations.

we barley slowed down. I was back at work now and and not really happy. But I owed my firm a lot because they are sponsoring my son. My lover. My future.

I came home from work and got the mail. The letter from DNA diagnostics was there. I held it with great dread and waited for my son.

He arrived and looked at me. “What’s wrong?” he asked. I held up the envelope. I saw him lose all his color. I had no idea he was as worried about it as I was. He came and sat by me.

“I don’t want to change what we are.” He said firmly. I could see his eyes begin to gloss up, and I will tell you I have never felt more wanted in my life. My lips started to turn up as I realized he was going to fight to keep me. he didn’t have to fight. I wasn’t going to leave him. No matter what the letter said I wanted to be with him, as my lover.

I kissed him and said. “I am going to make love to you…. So…. All I want to know is do you want to find out if you’re a mother-fucker…. Before…. or after we start???”

He took the letter. Opened it and watching his eyes I could tell he was reading it. A long moment passed when he looked up into my eyes and said. “This letter will not change us. I am not giving you up…. MOM!!!”

I smile, but somehow, I was not surprised at all.

 “Well are you going to take me to our room and make love to me like a good little mother fucker or not???”

@!!!#$$$$###########IF YOU DON’T KNOW????###########%%%%%%!!!!!!

                EPALOG.

It had been ten years since I found my son, my lover and my sole mate. We have been happily married for nine and a half of them. I gave birth to twin girls, they look a lot like daddy, uncle. They are healthy and great looking girls. We were worried for the same reason you are. But we had them checked out completely before I delivered them and were pleased to say that they were fine when I delivered them with my son, lover, husband, best friend and sole mate beside me coaching me through each contraction.

I talked to my parents for the first time in almost fifteen years. They said they missed me. I told them I missed my son too. but I told them that I had found him and if they wanted to meet their grandson, I would arrange it. They told me they would get back to me. They haven’t bothered to call me back yet, and I haven’t called them back either.

My husband graduated from collage and has a phenomenal job. He works about sixty hours a week and makes great money. He loves his work but he makes time at home to be with me and our daughters.

I asked him a few times if he wanted to try for a son. But he keeps telling me that the risk is too great that another incestuous child might come out a problem. So, we all are happy with the too girls.

I love my girls my husband-son and they love me. it doesn’t make up for my loss of my son when he was young but I get threw it.

One last thing. I met Samuels adopted parents, he was right they are wonderful people. They aren’t to happy about us being together. But they still invite us for holidays, birthdays and weekends. You should see them with our two girls. Just watching them with Katlin and Kathern. Is enough to make my heart sing. They are beautiful together.

Thank you for reading…

R Lee Benton

Comments welcome.